Post mental breakdown hang out with @jk-destroyed-our-best-gay-ships my sweet pace 💛💛💛 ( that sweet cinnamon roll asked for a hot chocolate, and me, as a true badass, for a beer)
best friend to hang out with after crying your eyes out, 11/10 would recommend 💛
( btw, voldemort does not exist in this universe bc fuck that guy, right? )
after hogwarts, remus is determined to get a job
he knows it will be tough, he knows he’ll be treated like garbage, but he had to rely on other people’s charity for too long and he just wants to prove himself
lily, peter, james and remus all pretty much immediatly find jobs they love
but remus is struggling to even be allowed to be a waiter
wizarding jobs immediatly reject him : even with the registry being kept secret, they look at his frequent sick leaves and immediatly make the connection
muggle jobs are no easier : people are put off by the thick scars on his face and his mysterious chronic illness
and everytime remus sees his boyfriend coming home happy from work, he feels a little lower
everytime he cant pay his half of the rant or his part of the grocery shopping, shame creeps up on him
james insists on supporting him, claiming that’s it’s just temporary, but it had last for two years now and there is no evidence it’s about to stop
it all escalates until he gets a new rejection letter filled with insults and threats and he just breaks down
he refuses to get back at home for three entire days, sirius is loosing his shit
finally, him and sirius meet to really talk
and sirius all but begs him to take a break with the work search and to stop accepting every slur and threat just to get underpaid short stints in terrible conditions
remus comes home, and for 6 months he just stays there
he’s being the nice stay-at-home husband : cooking and cleaning and gardening and taking care of harry when needed
after that, he is hesitant to try to work again, but he is feeling useless just staying at home ( even when sirius reassures him that he is being plenty useful )
so he tries volunteering for charities
and people are a bit hesitant to take him in, sure, but they need the help
he gets to work in charity shops and kitchens, and with kids
he loves it, obviously
its not perfect : he is still relying on james and sirius’ money, but at least he is doing something
he feels so much better, strangely, after an unpaid shift at the charity shop than an underpaid one at a grocery store
and eventually, he figures out that he really loves working with kids
so harry and a few friends’ kids become the first students of his small unofficial school for magical kids
he only has 5 or 6 students, but he is having fun and he is actually getting paid and it’s amazing
he still doesnt make much, but he is paying his entire part of the bills for the first time
and he can even occasionally get sirius or his friends a present and hes so proud everytime and I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS ABOUT THIS OKAY
if i ever become a best seller author ( which wont happen but who cares ) i want to do a website like pottermore but instead of all the stupid things jk is feeding us i’ll publish the most useless bits of trivia
“to understand this character, you have to know that at age 6 they banged their toe against their bedside table. the incident shaped them into the person they are today”
please become a bestselling author ill give u my lucky pen it isnt much but it works
that i am incapable of making friends or just talking with people normally
TWO fears :
my friend group wont survive after high school. my grandma as a person.
THREE turn-ons :
sharing secrets. crushing hugs. super long hair.
FOUR life goals :
fly. having a book published. marrying someone i love. owning a beautiful apartment.
FIVE things i like :
spinach and cheese lasagna. tea. wearing new clothes for the first time. long text exchanges. exchanging a smile with a stranger.
SIX weaknesses :
my calf. animals, any kinds. my poor physical health. my general lack of motivation and energy. my anxiety. my overwhelming desire to be the perfect friend. how i underestimate myself.
SEVEN things i love :
my cat. dreaming of new adventures. the english language. people using the right pronouns for me. my friends. my parents. curling up in my bed.
im sharing my thoughts in a new post, both to expand on it and allow people who wanted to read/share but werent comfortable with discourse to read/share
________
peter didnt betray his friends just because he was in a bad mood !!!! his story is, to me, one of the most complex and interesting one in the saga
lets take a closer look at the shack scene in book three where his betrayal is revealed, shall we?
Remus : “For the first time ever, I had friends, three great friends… Sirius… Peter… and, of course, James”
notice how peter’s name is the second to be named? same on the map. peter was often described as a tag along by adults, but he obviously wasnt. he was important in their friend group, far more than we believe.
Remus, talking about how difficult the animagus process was : “Peter needed all the help he could get.”
the process, according to remus, could have gone terribly wrong! and peter was struggling! he was obviously taking very big risks, but he did so for remus. that’s incredibly brave! no one could have blamed him if he stopped bc it was becoming very dangerous for him, but he didnt! he obviously cared so much for his friends!
sirius : “Voldemort would never dream they’d use a weak, talentless thing like you…”
once again, we can see it : peter was underestimated by everyone and probably wasnt very academically inclined
Hermione : “How come he never tried to hurt Harry before now?”
okay, so i know we shouldnt congratulate peter for not murdering someone, but hey its true : during 12 years, peter was behaving just fine! he bit the fingers of the bullies who made fun of harry, and that shows that he isnt just evil. its not much, but it actually proves that he cared at least a little bit about harry, or at least felt guilty enough to do it, and that’s something
Peter : “Sirius, Sirius, what could i have done? The Dark Lord… you have no idea… he has weapons you cant even imagine… I was scared, Sirius, I was never brave like you and Remus and James, I never meant for it to happen… You-Know-Who forced me…”
ALRIGHT LET’S ANALYSE THAT
alright so its obvious that peter was completely terrified, which is understandable. the “what could i have done” also makes me think that peter didnt think that he had a choice, and the “forced me” just emphasizes that. he felt completely powerless in front of voldemort, and it probably helped that he was always seen as weak : he just didnt consider that he could possibly said no. but its more complicated than that
its the “weapons you cant imagine” that catches my attention… the wizarding wars arent really a matter of weapons : you only have your magic skills. the only weapon mentionned is, i think, the prophecy. so i think it’s quite clear the weapons are just unusual bits of magic. you know what kind of magic voldemort excelled at ? mental manipulation. he was an amazing legilimens and when he was just a kid he managed to persuade two other kids to follow him in a very dangerous and scary place. i think it’s what happened to peter : he was mentally used and probably tortured by voldemort.
all of that is made worse by what sirius then says : “you’d been passing information to him for a year before”
okay so there is a well known manipulation technique that consists in asking for a small favor to build your way up to bigger ones – first asking to borrow 5 dollars then to just be given 20, to simplify it.
obviously this isnt the same, but i do believe than in a year, voldemort was able to use both psychology and magic mental manipulation to get peter under his complete control. imagine : it starts with voldemort asking when the next order mission is, then when peter refuses to tell him get the answer via legilimancy, to make him feel powerless. it builds up, the mental manipulation and constant mind abuse keeps going until he asks for the potters, and then all of that plus the legitimate fear of being killed just makes it easier to persuade peter to tell him
i think this whole mental abuse is also the reason why peter goes back to voldemort, and seems completely terrified of him even tho he’s a defenseless half life, being ready to give up his hand for him.
clarification : NO i am not trying to say peter is innocent, he did something terrible and kept doing terrible things afterwards, but his story is more complicated than “he was evil” or “he was scared”
Fuck JKR 