get ready kiddo cause i’m sleep deprived, have a fever and a non-functionning memory and i’m gonna tell it as well as i can remember it
i’ll probably have to edit it when my brain is less clouded
tw: discussion of masturbation, slight internalized acephobia
okay so it happened in my second year of high school. i was reading a fic with an asexual character, and at some point this character said “it took me a long time to figure out sexual attraction wasn’t just about finding people pretty”. when i read that, my first reaction was “well that’s pretty much what it is, right?” but my dumbass self didn’t think anything of it
at the time, i identified as bisexual and i had a minor crush on a girl in my class. at some point, i tried masturbating while thinking about her (because that’s what people in fics did) but it didn’t really work. i started to freak out, thinking that maybe i wasn’t really bisexual (it never occured to me that i had never masturbated while thinking of a guy either)
one day, i was in PE class and i was sitting on the bench waiting for my turn. suddenly, i broke into tears. my friend asked me what was wrong, but i didn’t even know.
that night, when i came home, my instinct took over. i grabbed my phone and googled “signs that you may be asexual” and then “am i ace self-test”. when most of the results came back positive, i realized that i was, indeed, ace. and then i scrolled the tumblr tag for hours to collect more data
here it is! i hope it could be helpful, or at least make you laugh at my cluelessness!
though i will say: you do not have to pick a label if you don’t want it. if you don’t want to pick a case, or if you want to wait before choosing, or if you change those labels later in your life, it’s all completely fine. i wish you a happy journey of self discovery, and i hope you find something that makes you feel like yourself! Hugs!
Fuck JKR 