captofthesswolfstar:

Lily: *eating chips on the couch and staring blankly ahead*

James: *sits down* can I have some of those?

Lily: …no…

James: the bag says “party size”

Lily: well, you know what they say. Two is a party, three is a crowd.

James:…

Lily:…

James: wait…what?

Lily: *points to herself* one. *points to her stomach* two.

James:…

Lily:…

James:…holy shit

accio-shitpost:

thought on the amount of people in hogwarts: classes are combined between two houses, so half of each year would be in one class at once. there’s only one teacher per subject, so only one group could be doing, say, potions at one time. there really aren’t enough kids at hogwarts to fill a whole bigass castle, huh?

yeah but like 3 quarters of the castle is filled with dumbie’s death traps

also : in harry’s first year, all the students were born during the war. and people have less kids during the war, and some of them die, so i think there are usually more students

reasons why elliot is a massive fuck up #249

i was cooking and i needed to mix sugar and softened butter. now as i start mixing i realized the butter wasnt melted enough, but since it’s already well mixed to the sugar i dont want to take it off the bowl

so i immediately think “oh wait im so clever and crafty i have a solution”

and my stupid gay ass grabs my hairdryer thinking “the heat will will melt the butter 😄”

OBVIOUSLY it was a stupid idea bc as soon as i started heating it i didnt even have the time to see if it worked before the hairdryer sent the sugar flying off all over the kitchen

now my kitchen is dirty and my butter is still not melting. someone mercy kill me.