nachodiablo:

Imagine how excited Sirius is after Harry goes back to Hogwarts with the two-way mirror in his pocket. “This’ll be aces,” he tells Buckbeak. “Harry will open the package as soon as he gets back to school, bet he won’t be able to wait. He’ll want to try it out right away. It’ll be just like old times.” Buckbeak rolls his eyes skeptically as Sirius settles onto the couch with a bottle of firewhiskey, whistling merrily as he flips the mirror around in his hands.

How many shots of firewhiskey does it take before he stops whistling, lowering the mirror to rest in his lap so that he won’t miss any incoming messages?

How many shots of firewhiskey before he starts jumping every time he sees a flicker of the fireplace light reflect in the mirror, thinking that it’s movement on the other side?

How many shots of firewhiskey before he starts clearing his throat, calling out “Harry?” every fifteen minutes or so?

How many shots of firewhiskey before he whispers, “James?”

YOU SHUT UP RIGHT NOW