remus: sirius, it’s valentine’s day. james and peter both have dates. you’ve said no to all 14 girls who’ve asked you out so far, claiming you already had plans. but you’re just sat here keeping me company in the deserted common room. why did you turn down all these girls and what the hell are your plans?
sirius, stretching so he can casually put his arm around remus’ shoulders: take a wild guess, lupin.